Michelle Obama says that she and Barack Obama have different love languages: ‘Stop kissing me. Just do the laundry.

  • Michelle Obama spoke about their relationship in “The Light Podcast” in conversation with Oprah Winfrey.
  • The author of “The Light We Carry” said she and her husband, Barack Obama, differ on “how we show love.”
  • Michelle said she prefers acts of service, while Barack shows more physical and verbal affection.

Michelle Obama and Barack Obama have different styles when it comes to showing and receiving love, something that took time to get used to, she said on an April 25 episode of her Audible series. “The Light Podcast”.

On the podcast, featuring talks of Michelle’s memoir book tour events. “The Light We Carry”, Interviewer Oprah Winfrey asked the former first lady how she and Barack handle their relationship differently.

Michelle said her husband is more verbally and physically affectionate because he and his family lived apart and didn’t see each other very often, while she grew up surrounded by family and views expressing love as being present.

“One of the things that is different in the way we show love is that because her family lived far away and traveled a lot, she had to learn to love from a distance,” the former first lady said.

Barack Obama hugs Michelle Obama, who sports bangs, in the Blue Room of the White House in 2013.

Barack Obama hugs Michelle Obama in the Blue Room of the White House in 2013.

Official White House Photo by Pete Souza

Marriage counselor gary chapmann created the five love languages in 1995, categorizing how each person wants to receive love: words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time, and physical contact. While Michelle said that Barack leans more towards words of affirmation and physical contact, she prefers acts of service and quality time.

“I grew up with everyone within eight blocks of each other,” she said. “All my aunts, uncles, great uncles, cousins, and everyone celebrated birthdays. So we were together, every weekend, twice a weekend. We were always together. So it was like, ‘Hmm, bye. I don’t I have to tell you that I love you because I’m seeing you on Saturday. So love, for me, was coming through. It was like, ‘Yeah, yeah. Stop kissing me. Just do the laundry.'”

Michelle has opened up about other challenges she has experienced during her 30 year marriagesaying in a 2022 Revolt x Michelle Obama special that she “couldn’t stand” barack for 10 years after the birth of their daughters until realizing that “marriage is not 50/50, ever.”

“I think more of us need to be honest about the work it takes to build a life with another person,” he told Winfrey on the podcast.

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